数算恩典[48]神…
音频 三分钟
「我的心哪，你要称颂耶和华，凡在我里面的，也要称颂他的圣名！」【诗103: 1】
神最清楚人的软弱，故先向人施行丰盛的恩典，然后就接纳人的赞美。因此，当我们的心和嘴唇不再赞美神，就意味着我们忘却了神的恩惠。
人没有照他所蒙的恩，报答耶和华，因他心里骄傲。神对人最大的恩惠，就是祂没有按我们的罪过待我们，也没有照我们的罪孽报应我们。
罪人是健忘的，常常被眼见所吸引，等不多时，他们就忘了神的作为，不仰望祂的指导，结果就忘记耶和华 – 他们的神，去事奉诸巴力和亚舍拉。因此，我们只有常常称颂耶和华，才能不忘记自己的罪孽和神的恩惠。
我们时常会忘记主赐下的恩典，只记得要凭自己努力和耐心面对挑战。让我们学会调整心态，选择过一个数算恩典的生活模式 – 活在基督里。
我们可以每天记录下当日所领受神的恩典与祝福，并在睡前给自己一段亲近上帝的祷告时间，轻声地说：[主阿 ! 谢谢祢赐给我这些恩典] 领受恩典的秘诀，就是不要忘记感恩。若你愿意数算主恩，你会时常活在神施恩的喜乐中。
正如大卫所说：他赦免你的一切罪孽，医治你的一切疾病。他救赎你的命脱离死亡，以仁爱和慈悲为你的冠冕。 我们的一生就是在与神相遇的过程中，得着美好的恩典。每当我们开口祷告，过去那些神所赐的救赎、医治的能力、解决烦忧的平安，都会安慰我们的心。
神就在我们每一个祷告者当中。祂是我们生命中的救主、助手和导师，随时带着关爱的眼神保守我们。让我们数算所有曾经领受过的恩典，带着感恩的心向神表达谢意吧！
神用美物使你所愿的得以知足，以致你如鹰返老还童。老鹰是力量和青春的象征。但那等候耶和华的必从新得力。他们必如鹰展翅上腾；他们奔跑却不困倦，行走却不疲乏。 我们如同老鹰一样，被赋予新的力量和能力，我们人生的过去、现在、未来都在神的手中引领，让我们带着祂的恩典度过每一天。
世人若能放下自我的超能”人定胜天”的心态，承认自己的软弱，以谦卑的心与神同行才是最重要的观念。当你意识到神所赐下的种种恩典，留心数算，你会在生活中的每个角落，看见上帝的作为。当今让我们一起数算神的恩典吧！感谢神 ! 奉主耶稣圣名蒙恩! 阿们!
?真实的恩典[13…
音频 1 分钟
所以，神配合的，人不可分开。【可10: 9】
「神配合的，人不可分开。」神在教会里面也配搭众肢体，所以我们不可分门别类。
婚姻是神所设立的，在婚姻里面他所设立是一男一女，一夫一妻，一生一世，这是神的心意。在伊甸园里面，神设立了第一个婚姻，一男一女。亚当夏娃，一夫一妻，然后是一生一世。
基督与教会乃是神所配合的，人不可分开──不可让任何属灵的人事物、道理和规条，插在基督和教会之间。
神配合的，人不可分开。婚姻不是一次的冲动，婚姻是我寻求神在我身上的计划。用一个月的时间来祷告，我们停下我们继续交往的脚步，我们跟主说，求主帮助我，让我很清楚。
求就必得着，我放下我的想法说，我们认真的去寻求。这是神把我们配合在一起。我们有很多的不一样，但是我们持守这个约。因为知道，这真的是神配合的。求，祂一定回答你。感谢神 ! 奉主耶稣圣名蒙恩! 阿们!
?真实的恩典[13…
音频 三分钟
你们里面应当有盐，彼此和睦。【可9: 50】
我很喜欢早上起来用敬拜开始一天，然后跟主说，每一次的敬拜我都把我自己，我都把我自己带到你的宝座面前，我和你生命有一个爱的关系，一个爱的连结。我真的相信当我活在主的爱里面的时候，一整天我都走在上帝的祝福里面。祝福你一整天走在上帝荣耀的祝福当中。
门徒训练不是坐在教室里的，门徒训练不是拿着一个课本照本宣科，是在生活当中俯拾皆是教材。门徒在争论谁最大，带出一个教导来；门徒在那里跟人家讲说告状，带出一个教导来；门徒在每一件事上，耶稣告诉他们说，你要谨慎这个，你要小心那个。那个教导是更生活化，是更贴近生命的。圣经里面你会看到耶稣非常多的教导不是悬在半空中，不是不食人间烟火的，祂是真真实实的从生活出发的。
12个门徒跟着耶稣，这里面有血气方刚的，有打渔的，有老粗，有不识字的，还有一些就是奋锐党的西门 – 思想很偏激很激动，这些人天天生活在一起，是一天24小时在一起，怎么会没有摩擦呢？一定会有。碰到那些摩擦的时候，耶稣教导他们，祂说你们在世上神要我们成为盐。祂说，我们怎么样能够成为盐呢？
世上的盐，世上的光，要让别人因着我们的好行为，归荣耀给神。但是我们怎么样能够成为光，除非主在我们里面，我们才有光，因为祂就是光；除非我们里面有盐，耶稣说你们里头应当有盐，彼此和睦。我们怎么样能够像盐一样，彼此调和，除非我自己里面先有盐。耶稣对门徒说，我要你们在世上成为盐，去调和这个世代，使人和睦。但是如果你们自己里面没有盐，你们自己又天天吵架，你怎么可能成为别人的祝福呢？
说说圣经的道理，而这个道理却不能够在我的生命里面改变我这个人，这样说出来的道理是没有影响力的。只有生命影响生命，不是道理改变生命。各种不同的学说理论都有道理。如果道理就能够解决人生命的问题，那太简单了。道理只是让人知道，但是只有生命真实的经验改变、做到，才能够带来影响力。
耶稣对门徒说，你们里面到底有没有盐，如果我们里面都彼此不和睦，我们讲再多和睦的道理也不能够带下和睦来。如果我自己都长期活在一个不圣洁的生命里面，我讲再多圣洁的道理也不会影响别人，别人充其量说“不错不错，这个人讲的不错”，可是光觉得讲得不错，却不会带出改变，除非那个道先改变我。求主帮助我，让我自己先被改变，愿我里面有盐，愿你里面有盐，我们彼此调和。感谢神 ! 奉主耶稣圣名蒙恩! 阿们!
?真实的恩典[13…
音频 三分钟
倘若你有一只眼叫你跌倒，就去掉它；你只有一只眼进入神的国，强如有两只眼被丢在地狱里。【可9: 47】
耶稣是这一位荣耀的君王，却谦卑的来做仆人服事，服事你服事我，服事历世历代每一个祂所爱的儿女，祂是如此的谦卑。祂没有什么大段的的信息，祂的登山宝训讲道比较少，而更多的时候其实是在生活当中。祂带着门徒，祂训练这批门徒，在生活当中发生什么事祂就随事随在就有一些短短的教导。而那些教导比在教室里面的教导更宝贵，因为那是生活里面真真实实智慧和经验的累积。
耶稣教导门徒，每一个教导都是一个价值观，祂告诉门徒怎么样防范那个罪的引诱。祂提到有一些东西会引诱我们，那些东西会引诱我们陷到罪里面去，会做那些不该做的事，看那些不该看的东西。祂说如果我的眼睛让我犯罪，我就把眼睛挖出来；如果我的手让我犯罪，我宁可没有这只手。
祂用那个宁可，宁可是一个比较。有了这个失去那个，我宁愿要那个。我更看重的是在上帝的恩典，我要走在神的祝福和恩典里面。这就是一个价值观。
有一天主跟我讲说，你一直说救我脱离凶恶，救我脱离凶。主说你愿不愿意为着不让自己陷到罪里面，我宁可多花一点时间，我宁可累一点，但是强如我每天走这条路却让我一直陷在情欲的罪里面？那就是宁可。我宁可放掉一个更好的职位，免得我在那个位置上陷到撒但的引诱里面。
宁可！你今天是不是也正在面对一些人生当中的抉择呢？当你决定要A或者B的时候要不要想一想，会不会有一些看起来很吸引你，但是却会让你离神愈来愈远，你怎么选择呢？感谢神 ! 奉主耶稣圣名蒙恩! 阿们!
Testimony…
Listen for 4 min
This happened three and a half years ago; I had this idea because I’ve been a missionary and pastor in Hong Kong for almost five years. But two and a half years ago, I was actually struggling: “Do you really want to go back to Singapore?” Because I am a Singaporean, I have been serving in China, the Philippines, Hong Kong and other places for the past few years, and I have also shepherded children in different churches, different businessmen, and different university fellowships.
Two and a half years ago, I actually thought, “I’m tired, I’m tired – I really want to go back to Singapore to rest and give up my ministry in Hong Kong!” But one day I came back from a mission trip in the Philippines, and I went to McDonald’s, and I saw a young man over there, who was dressed neatly (shirt, tie), but he seemed very unhappy. After I bought the meal, I sat down next to him, introduced myself as a pastor, and said to him, “Hey, young man, “Hi, is everything OK? Is there anything I can pray for you?” The young man said, “What’s wrong with you, what’s your business?” But when he said that, his eyes were red.
So I said, “Okay, can you ask the pastor to pray for you and bless you, and you can tell the pastor what’s going on?” Then he waited a little and looked at me and said, “Yes, pastor, you pray for me!” “Actually, I went to apply today, but I don’t know if I can pass the application? I am the eldest in the family, and when I go back today, my parents will ask me to move out, because there is not enough room to rest at home, and the family does not have enough funds. In addition, my job is unstable because I have been working as a casual worker, part-time worker, and contract employee since I came out of university.” When I heard this, I actually felt heartache.
A young man in Hong Kong said to me, “Not having money is one thing, not having a place to live is another, and I feel tired of running every day.” I asked him, “Hey, young man, what is your dream?” If God gave you a dream, He wouldn’t take it away! He will look at you and fulfill your dreams and everyone’s dreams on His time and schedule!
“Pastor, I don’t know if I’ll have enough for my next meal, and I don’t know where I’m going to stay… Don’t talk about dreams, I don’t even dare to think about a dream!” To me, a 22-year-old kid who had just graduated said such things to me! I felt so heartbroken, so I decided to stay, and I said, “All right, God… We changed the name of the church to “Dream Ministry”! Because when we took the church back, the name of the church had not been changed. REVER IS A FRENCH WORD FOR “DREAM,” SO WE’RE CALLED REVERSER MINISTRIES.
At that time, we blessed the child with God’s Word and said to him, “God actually has a dream for you, and that dream is to give you a “future”, so don’t let your future be affected by your current difficulties! When the young man heard this, he was amazed and said, “Even though I am not a Christian, I feel a very comfortable peace!” I went on to tell him, “Your dreams will enable you to fulfill what God wants you to do!” I asked him again, “What do you want to do?” 「 Pastor, I want to be a banker” (it turns out that he just went to Citibank to apply, but he didn’t know if he would be able to pass).
I encouraged him, “If God gave you a dream to be a banker, He wouldn’t take it away! He would look at you and fulfill your dream and everyone’s dream according to His time and schedule!” In human thinking, dreams are always considered unrealistic. Especially for children in Hong Kong.
But what I’m saying is God’s promise that it will be fulfilled and that it will be won! Then I said to this young child, “Every human being is God’s dream, and God has a plan and a goal for you!” That’s how I encouraged him, and then I prayed for him.
After a week or two, he called me back and said, “Pastor, I want to believe in your God! Because I have never seen such a god make man’s dream come true! I believe in miracles, and my dream will come true!” Then a month later, he received a letter from Citibank saying that he had been accepted! Then I used this opportunity to preach the gospel to him, saying, “God loves you, and God uses His love and dreams to build people’s careers.
God gives a dream to everyone, and God will give you a dream, and God will fulfill it, because God is a faithful God!” I’ll give you an example, Walt Disney, the founder of Disney, doesn’t he own a Disneyland? But when Walt Disney died, Disneyland in Florida was still unfinished, but his workers said, “This dream has been fulfilled!” Walt Disney’s idea and purpose was to create a “world where people go.” The happiest place” as the goal!
God said, “I have a plan for you.” So you know, God is preparing, preparing a dream for you. And everyone’s dreams are unique, and everyone’s dreams are very different.
As long as you believe and have hope, God will fulfill your dreams. Because He has chosen you and given you the destiny, the plan, the goal, and the will to accomplish what He wants to do! I want to encourage you to ask, when you get tired of running, “God, what dreams can I have, what can I accomplish?”
Because what you can become must be based on the dreams God has given you. And it’s not what you can do, it’s what you can become! For God is a faithful God, amen. The young man said to me, “Pastor, I want to be a relationship manager in a bank. Today he has been promoted, and in these three short years, following God, he has risen from manager to director. Although he is not in my church, God allowed the two of us to have this communication, and from this communication, God told me to bring a dream, a hope, and bless the young people in Hong Kong, so that they can know that God’s love is eternal and eternal! Through this experience, although it was only a very short hour, I was there to have breakfast with this young man in Hong Kong and pray for him, which could not have been easier, but through this young man, I changed me and made me want to stay in Hong Kong so that I can bless the young people in Hong Kong.
I would love to bring down the secrets of heaven and bless the people of Hong Kong and bring them hope, hope and expectation. Because God loves people, and God loves you Hong Kong people! Amen.
恩典见证 39.我…
音频 3 分钟
这事情发生在三年半的时候； 我有这个想法，是因为我已经在香港做宣教士、牧师已经差不多有五年了。 可是两年半前，其实我在挣扎：「是不是真的想要回新加坡？」 因为我本身是新加坡人，这几年都在中国、菲律宾、香港等地服事，也在不一样的教会 、不一样的生意人、不一样的大学团契里牧养孩子们。
二年半前我其实有想过：「累了、心累了 – 真的想要回新加坡休息，放弃香港的服事！」 可是有一天我从菲律宾的宣教回来，然后我去了麦当劳，在 那边见到一个年青人，他穿得很整齐（衬衫、领带），可是他显得很不开心。 我买了餐之后，就坐在他旁边，介绍自己是个牧师，然后对他说：「嘿！年青人」「Hi, is everything OK?有 什么事我能为你祷告吗？」 那年青人说：「理你才怪，关你屁事啊？ 」可是当他说这句话的时候，他的眼睛是红红的。
我就说：「好不好你让牧师为你祷告、祝福你，你可以跟牧师说发生了什么事？」 后来他等了一下，看着我说：「好！牧师你为我祷告！」 「 其实我今天是去应征的，可是那个应征也不知道能不能通过？我在家里是老大，今天回去，爸妈就要我搬出去住，因为家里不够地方休息，家里的资金也不够。加上 我的工作又不稳定，因为我从大学出来了之后，就一直在做散工、兼职、合约员工」 我听到的时候，其实感到心痛。
一个香港的年青人，他跟我说：「没有钱是一件事情、没有地方住是另外一件事情、每天的生活都在奔跑，觉得很累」 我就问他：「嘿，年青人 你的梦想是什么？」 要是神给你一个梦，祂不会挪去这个梦的！ 祂会看着你，按着祂的时间、安排，去成就你的梦，以及每一个人的梦！
「牧师，我现在都不知道下一餐饭够不够吃、我也不知道要去哪里住…别说梦，我连一个梦想也不敢去想！」 对我来说，一个22岁刚毕业 不久的孩子，竟然跟我说这种话！ 我觉得很心痛，所以我就决定留下来，我说：「好吧，神啊…我们把教会的名字改为「梦事工」！ 」 因为我们把教会接回来的时候，教会的名字都还没有改。 REVER是一个法文，叫做「梦」，所以我们是叫做 REVER MINISTRIES（梦事工）。
那时候，我们就用了神的话语来祝福这孩子，对他说：「神其实有一个梦给你，那个「梦」是要给你「未来」，不要让你的未来，因现在的困境 而受到影响！ 」 这年青人听的时候，觉得很奇妙，他说：「虽然我不是基督徒，但却觉得有一个很舒服的平安！」 我就继续再跟他说：「你的梦，可使你实现 神要你做的事情！」 我再问他：「你想做什么？」 「牧师，我想要做一个银行员」（原来他刚刚去了花旗银行应征，可是却完全不知道是否能通过） 。
我就鼓励他：「要是神给你一个梦，让你去做银行员的话，祂不会挪去这个梦的！祂会看着你，按着祂的时间、安排，去成就你的梦， 以及每一个人的梦！」 在人类的思维、角度里，总是认为梦是不实际的。 尤其对香港的孩子来说。
可是我要说的是神的承诺，必定成就，也会胜利！ 我再跟这个年青的孩子说：「每一个人都是上帝的梦想，神有计划和目标给你的！」 我就是这样子去鼓励他，然后我就为他祷告。
过了一个、两个星期，他回了一个电话给我，说：「牧师，我想相信你的神！因为，我从来没有看过有这样的神会成就人的梦想！我相信有奇迹，我 的梦想必会成真！」 后来真的在一个月之后，他收到花旗银行的一封信，说他被录取了！ 接着，我就用这个机会跟他传福音，说：「神爱你，神用祂的爱、梦想去建立人的事业。
神把梦给每一个人，神会给你一个 梦，神也必定会成就这梦，因为神是一个信实的神！」 我给你一个例子，迪士尼的创办人Walt Disney，他不是拥有一个迪士尼乐园吗？ 但Walt Disney 去世的时候，在佛罗里达的迪士尼乐园都还没完成，可是他的工人却说：「这个梦想已经成就了！」Walt Disney 的意念与目的就是要创造一个「让人去到世界上 最幸福的地方」为目标！
神说：「我已经有好的计画要给你！」 所以你要知道，神是准备、预备了一个梦是要给你的。 而每一个人的梦想都是独特的；每一个人的梦都是很不一样的。
只要你相信、有希望，神必定成就你的梦。 因为祂已经选择了你、给了你命定、计划、目标和意愿，来成就祂所要成就的事！ 我要鼓励你们，当你跑累了，你就问问：「上帝，我能作什么梦？我能成就什么？」
因为你能成为什么，一定是根据神所给你的梦。 并且，不是你能做什么，而是你能成为什么！ 因为神是一个信实的神，阿们！ 那年青人对我说：「牧师，我想在银行做客户经理。」 今天他已经升职了，在这短短的三年里跟随着神，他已从经理升到总监的位置上。 虽然他不是在我的教会，但神允许我们两个人有这个沟通，也从这个沟通里，神告诉我要带给香港年青人一个梦想、希望，并去祝福他们，好让他们知道：神 的爱是永远、永恒的！ 透过这个经历，虽然只是一个很短暂的一小时，我在那里跟这个香港年青人吃早餐、为他祷告，再也简单不过的动作，但却借着这年青人，改变了我，使我愿意 继续留在香港，好祝福香港的年青人。
我很想把天上的秘密带下来，祝福香港的人，把希望、盼望、期望带给他们。 因为神爱人、神爱你们香港人！ 阿们！
Testimony…
Listen for 4 min
1. The power of the gospel – the whole family is blessed
The story also starts from when I was born, since I was born, my mother has been seriously ill, although she has sought countless medical treatments, the medicine stones are ineffective, and the family is even more destitute.
Since that moment, on the most conspicuous table in our house, several “distinguished guests” have been invited one after another – Guanyin, the land god, the Buddha, etc. Although my father pulled my seriously ill mother and young me every day, punctually offered them offerings, offered incense, bowed down, and even underwent strict training in posture, after several years, these “miracle doctors and immortals” did not seem to have discussed and formulated a “treatment plan”, and my mother’s condition did not improve at all. In desperation, my father had to take my mother, who had no way to seek medical treatment, to “find” Jesus, who was “in the limelight” at that time, and was said to be a “great immortal with higher mana”.
Later, as the truth of the Bible deepened, their utilitarian hearts were eliminated and their faith was established. Finally, one day, my parents resolutely smashed the idol that they had worshiped in their family for many years, threw away the medicine jar that Lai Yi had lived for, and bravely opened the door of their home to those who believed in it in the confusion and doubts of their relatives, established the first church in the village and served God until now.
I was about five years old at the time, and because of my parent’s faith, I became a “little Christian” as a matter of course. But because I grew up in this “special” family environment, my “hatred” for God grew day by day!
2. God’s Elect – Personal Grace
“Cowardice and shame” is the deepest feeling and evaluation I have for those who believe in Jesus, especially my parents, as an adult.
It can be said that I grew up surrounded by all kinds of bullying and abuse from my neighbors! And any resistance and dissatisfaction will be severely reprimanded by my parents. I couldn’t understand what they were saying: This is suffering for the Lord! I just know that this God has made the mother who was once called “tigress” so cowardly and incompetent to her father, who was once regarded as a “capable man”! I hate God! I want to change this reality!
I’m very good at making friends, especially those who are seen as “ruffians” who are always easy to befriend. I enjoy this life because no one dares to mess with me. What God, what Jesus, unconsciously disappeared from my life. I squandered my life and youth in sin.
“So-and-so just crashed and died!” my friend casually told me, but it was a bolt from the blue! Not only because the deceased was my former best classmate, but also because I suddenly realized: I am afraid of death! Death was so close to me, and all of a sudden, fear permeated my heart. For many days after that, I was thinking, “If I die, where will I go, and who can solve the problem after death?” all of a sudden, Jesus came into my mind again, and it was my first encounter with Him after a long absence. Although it was only a brief experience, from then on, Jesus began His wonderful work in my life.
When my parents again urged me to pray and read the Bible, I no longer responded to them with the same tiredness as I once did, “Enough!” and I said to them, “I will pray.” And I prayed. Although that time, it was not so much a prayer as a reproach and a question against God! But I felt that God was listening! I felt that God was by my side!
Within a few days, my father forced me to quit my job. He said he was going to ask me to do something more important.
3. Experience the Lord’s grace – life renewal
It was only after I followed my father to a dilapidated village that he told me that I needed to study theology here for a few days. In desperation, I could only comfort myself, I should be at peace when I came! What I didn’t expect was that I made a best bosom friend here, Jesus.
In those few days of study, my myths about faith began to be dismantled, the value of life began to be repositioned, and my understanding of Jesus began to deepen. In just half a month, my life seems to have undergone an earth-shaking change. My once hard knees finally bent and I knelt before the Lord and confessed my sins and repented! I truly felt a sense of relief and joy at the forgiveness of my sins, the Holy Spirit came into my life, and I knew I was saved!
The Lord Jesus said, “The Son of Man has come to seek and save that which is lost.” (Luke 19:10) I am convinced that anyone who humbly confesses their sins and seeks Him will, like me, experience a “grace turn” from darkness to light, from pain to joy, and from bondage to be delivered!
4. The call of grace – total devotion
After being born again, although I did not experience Paul’s great light and did not see the vision of Moses, I truly felt God’s graceful call to my life to make my mission clear – to serve Him!
Although I have been receiving a lot of theological equipment over the years, and church leaders and my wife have constantly urged me to serve full-time, because of the endless “ambition” in my heart, my desire is still to try my best to be a good Christian, to participate in the church as much as possible, and to work and earn money is my primary goal in life. However, in the process of “serving God and mammon”, I felt the difficulty of “not having both fish and bear’s paws”.
In my work, whenever I work hard, I feel the constant depression and pain of my spiritual life, in the ministry, whenever I see the lack of shepherding workers in the church, the urgent need of young people and college students, like flock without a shepherd, my heart is full of anxiety, and in prayer, I keep hearing the reproach of the Holy Spirit with sighs and the gentle call of the Father—my son, my heart is mine. More than once, I burst into tears with excitement and shame.
After a long struggle, I finally relied on the Lord to overcome my “fear” of full-time ministry and responded to God’s call in the depths of my soul that I was willing to give my whole life to the Lord and dedicate my life to the Lord.
In the nearly 10 years of full-time ministry, although it was tiring, it was full of joy! I still can’t forget (and sometimes still experience) the struggle to withdraw from the pressure of ministry, the pain of mixed interpersonal complexities, and the helplessness of financial constraints in the face of various needs.
But thank God for allowing me to experience these “sufferings” in my ministry life, and it is because of this that I have experienced more deeply what “wonderful grace” is! It is a painful and joyful process, and it is a leap of faith that can lead one to “hear about him and see him with my own eyes”!
Pray that the Lord will continue to guide and strengthen me – that I can “serve Him with confidence and righteousness in holiness and righteousness.” (Luke 1:75).
恩典见证 38.奇…
音频 4 分钟
一、福音大能 – 全家蒙恩
故事，还要从我出生的时候说起，自我出生以后，母亲就一直重病缠身，虽求医无数，但药石皆无效，家里更是因此一贫如洗。
从那刻以后，我们家里最显眼的一张桌子上，就相继请来了几位“贵客” – 观音、土地神、如来佛祖等。虽然父亲每天都拉着重病的母亲和年幼的我，准时给它们上供、上香、跪拜，甚至连姿势都经过严格的训练，但数年过去了，这几位“神医大仙”好像还没有商讨、制定出一个“治疗方案”，母亲的病情丝毫不见起色。百般无奈，父亲不得不带着求医无门的母亲“找到”了当时“风头正劲”，据说“法力更高的大仙” – 耶稣。
之后，随着圣经真理上的进深，他们的功利之心被除掉，信心也得以坚立。终于有一天，父母毅然地砸掉了家中敬奉多年的偶像，扔掉了赖依为命的药罐，并在亲人的不解与质疑中，勇敢地将家门向相信的人敞开，建立了村庄里第一间教会，服事神直到如今；母亲的病也被神医治，直至今日从未再患。
那时我大约五岁，因着父母的信仰，我也顺理成章地成为了一个“小基督徒”。但因着成长在这个“特殊”的家庭环境，我对神的“恨”却与日俱增！
二、神的选召 – 个人蒙恩
“懦弱、羞耻”，是我在成年之后，对信耶稣的人，特别是我的父母最深刻的感受与评价。
可以说，我是在邻居的百般欺凌与辱骂声中成长的！并且任何的反抗与不满，都会受到父母严厉的指责。我无法理解他们所说的：这是为主受苦！我只知道，这位神使曾经被人称作“母老虎”的母亲，使曾经被人看为“能人”的父亲变得如此懦弱无能！我恨神！我要改变这个现实！
我很擅长交朋友，特别是那些别人眼中的“地痞流氓”总是很容易与我成为朋友。我享受这种生活，因为没有人敢惹我。什么神，什么耶稣，不知不觉从我的生命中消失了。我在罪恶中肆意地挥霍着我的生命与青春。
“某某人刚刚坠车死了！”朋友不经意地告知，对我却是一个晴天霹雳！不仅因为死者是我曾经十分要好的同学，更是因为我突然意识到：我很怕死！死亡离我是如此的近，霎时，恐惧弥漫在我的心里。之后的很多天，我都在思想：“如果我死了，我会去哪里呢？谁能解决死后的问题呢？”猛然间，耶稣再次进入了我的脑海，这是我与祂久违后第一次的相遇。虽然这只是一次短暂的经历，但从那时起，耶稣在我的生命中开始了祂奇妙的工作。
当父母再次劝勉我要好好祷告、读经的时候，我不再像曾经那样厌烦地回应他们：“够了！”而是连我自己都感到吃惊地对他们说：“我会祷告的。”并且，我真的祷告了。虽然那一次，与其说是祷告，不如说是对神的指责与质疑！但我却感受到，神在听！我感受到神在我身边！好奇妙！
没过几天，父亲“软硬兼施”的逼着我辞掉工作。他说，他要让我做一件更重要的事。
三、经历主恩 – 生命更新
当我稀里糊涂地跟着父亲来到了一个破旧的村庄之后，他才告诉我，我需要在这里上几天的神学。万般无奈之下，我只能安慰自己，既来之则安之吧！没想到的是，我在这里结交了一个最好的知心朋友 – 耶稣。
在那几天的学习当中，我对信仰的迷思开始得到解开，对生命的价值开始重新定位，对耶稣的认识开始更加深入。短短的半个月，我的生命仿佛经历了一个翻天覆地的改变。曾经坚硬的膝盖终于弯曲，我跪在主的面前，认罪悔改！我真实地感到一种罪得赦免的轻松与喜乐，圣灵进入我的生命，我知道我得救了！
主耶稣说：“人子来，为要寻找拯救失丧的人。”（路19: :10）我深信，任何一个谦卑认罪并寻求祂的人，都会像我一样，经历到从黑暗走向光明、从痛苦进入喜乐、从捆绑得到释放的“恩典转弯”！
四、恩典呼召 – 全然奉献
重生得救之后，虽然没有经历保罗的大光，没有看到摩西的异象，但我真实感受到神向我的生命发出了恩典的呼召，使我清楚人生的使命 – 事奉祂！
虽然多年来一直在接受许多的神学装备，教会领袖以及我的妻子都在不断地劝我全职事奉，但因为心里那未绝的“雄心壮志”，我的心愿仍然是：尽力地做一个好基督徒，尽量地参加教会的服事，工作赚钱却是我首要的人生目标。但是，在“事奉神又事奉玛门”的过程中，我感受到了“鱼与熊掌不可兼得”的难处。
在工作中，每当拼搏努力的时候，就感受到灵命在不断的消沉痛苦；在事奉中，每当看到教会缺少工人的牧养，青年人和大学生事工的迫切需求，如同群羊没有牧人一般，我的心就充满了焦急；在祷告中，不断听到圣灵带着叹息的责备，与天父温柔的呼唤 – 我儿，将心归我不止一次，我激动又羞愧地泪流满面。
挣扎良久，我终于靠着主，胜过了内心对全职事奉的“恐惧”，并回应了神在我灵魂深处的呼唤 – 我愿意全然奉献给主，一生为主竭诚献上。
在全职事奉近十年间，虽然很累，但却充满着喜乐！有苦吗？有！至今忘不了 – 在面对事奉压力时想退缩的挣扎，在面对人际复杂时五味杂陈的痛苦，在面对各种需要时却经济拮据的无奈.
但是，感谢神让我的事奉人生经历这些“苦”，正是因着它，我才更深地经历了什么是“奇妙的恩典”！这是一个痛苦并快乐着的过程；这是一个可以让人从“风闻有他，到亲眼看见他”的信心飞跃！
祈求主继续引领、坚固我 – 可以“坦然无惧地用圣洁、公义事奉他。”（路1: 75）