Science and technology workers in the United States. Born in Chengdu, Sichuan, he graduated from the Department of Chemistry at Fudan University. In 1992, he went to the United States to study, and since 1995, he has been engaged in chemical research and development in the United States, serving as an R&D engineer and technical manager, and is now the director of a consulting company. In 1995, he began to touch the Chinese network, and in the past ten years, he has published a large number of articles on the Chinese network, covering religion, science, society, culture, and other aspects, and is known as the “Internet pioneer”. Guest speaker on American campuses and guest on online TV stations. He founded and managed the Gideon Connection
I have always believed that everyone’s experience of believing in the Lord can be said to be a “miracle” in itself because too many people who seem to be completely impossible to believe in the Lord have been found by the true and living God of the universe. Let’s just talk about myself, with the background of the younger generation of “intellectuals” in the mainland, and studying natural sciences, it is really all God’s grace to be able to believe in the Lord and be saved today.
I was born into a family of mainland intellectuals, and my parents both graduated from medical school after graduation, I was “assigned” to work in the Tibetan area of Sichuan, where life is difficult and the climate is “cold”. I was raised by my grandmother when I was a child, so I was able to stay in the city and get some education. When he was a child, he was an “obedient and sensible” child. When I was in middle school, the college entrance examination system had been restored, and although I was still young, I already knew in my mind that the only way out was to go to university, and I could get rid of the “fate” of going back to my parents to work . So he worked harder to study and was later admitted to Fudan University. In addition to Xi studying chemistry during college, I also struggled to absorb knowledge from other aspects and gradually became interested in Western thought and culture, and at the same time formed an “outlook on life” based on self-reliance on “personal struggle”.
At that time, although I was already suspicious and rebelled against the “official” ideology, I didn’t think much about and pursue my beliefs, and I proudly thought in my heart: “I don’t believe in anything but myself.” “After graduating from university, I returned to Chengdu to work and enter society, but I still have no faith at all. On the one hand, he wastes time in the “entertainment” of playing mahjong, but on the other hand, he is still a little “unwilling to sink”, because of the little remnant of the traditional “worrying about the country and the people” of Chinese “intellectuals” in his heart, he also wants to pursue a little “ideal”. Although the concept of “ideal” at that time was vague, it probably meant “doing something useful for the country and the people”. At that time, I thought that I was quite good, and it was better than my peers, the “Beat Generation”, who were completely indifferent to things like “ideals”.
Young intellectuals – The greatest spiritual anguish is the lack of faith in life, the confusion of the meaning of life and its value. I tried my best to get rid of this loss, but the pursuit of fame and fortune made me unable to get real satisfaction, the “entertainment” of “working people and wasting money” is tantamount to “drinking water to quench thirst”, and the state of the world in society made me realize the treacherous and sinister nature of the human heart. I began to realize that “the core of the problem is the problem of people’s hearts”, and at the same time, I saw my insignificance and pathetic: with my hopeless “human weakness”, I could not even “surpass” myself.
Amid my anguish, I was dimly aware of the need for a transcendent faith. I started reading more books on philosophy and religion. From Western philosophy to traditional Chinese thought, from Buddhism, Taoism, Lao, and Zhuang, to existentialism, and even Qigong and Destiny, I can occasionally see flashes of human wisdom, but these things do not give me the answer to the meaning of life. I also read a few books about Christianity, most of which were skeptical, critical, and even invective. The few fairer ones only introduce Christian thought as one of the spiritual pillars of the West. There is a book called “Salvation and Escape”.
From the perspective of “comparative philosophy”, the Christian belief system is “compared” with other Eastern and Western philosophical religions. Although there is no conclusion in the book, after reading it, I have a deep admiration for the Christian faith and a yearning for this belief in God. It was during this time that I was able to get some exposure to the living Christian faith by getting to know some Christians. In 1990, I went to get an amateur English tour guide license to earn some “extra money” as a “second career”. At that time, there was a Chinese escort from the British “Hovercraft Yangtze River Scientific Expedition” who hired me as an interpreter through a travel agency. The purpose of this expedition was to use hovercraft to “explore” the upper reaches of the Yangtze River, going upriver to the source of the Yangtze River.
I thought it was very interesting, and I also wanted to make some money, so I asked the unit for leave to participate in this unusual “long drift”. I later learned that almost all of the members of the group were Christians, and they had their careers and families in England. They volunteered to form a team, and each of them paid out of their pocket to come to China for this event, not for leisure purposes. In addition to scientific investigation and research in geography, geology, materials, medicine, etc., they also have an important purpose, that is, to use hovercraft, a modern means of transportation, to try to deliver medicine to isolated areas such as the upper reaches of the Yangtze River, introduce modern science and technology, and carry out humanitarian assistance. However, their activities have endured several setbacks, not only to fight against the harsh natural environment in the upper reaches of the Yangtze River but also to overcome various man-made obstacles. Despite the approval of the State Council, they still have to deal with bureaucracy and some mercenary Chinese personnel all day long, and sometimes even I, the translator, cannot help but be frustrated. But I saw that these Christians were patiently praying, looking to their God, and loving to forgive and understand others.
I spent more than a month with them in the upper reaches of the Yangtze River, and they did not have the opportunity to systematically preach the gospel to me, but I saw the strength of their faith and the positive impact of their trust in God on their lives from their attitude in the face of difficulties and dangers and from the natural outpouring of their transcendent faith. This kind of living “testimony” is far more authentic and credible than the philosophy in the books, which has made me feel good about the Christian faith, and it has also invisibly offset some preconceived preconceptions and misunderstandings. After this “long drift,” a friend of mine who was studying English told me that he had come to Christ and invited me to a “family meeting” of their young Christians in one state. I had the opportunity to meet a new generation of Chinese Christians and to see and hear how this group of young people from similar backgrounds prayed, studied, sang, and shared. However, at that time, I only had the attitude of “seeing”, and my identification with the Christian faith was still at the level of culture and knowledge, and I never thought of “believing in the Lord” and letting this faith have a relationship with my life. I came to the United States in August ’92 to study. Everyone who comes out of the mainland has a large number of twists and turns of going abroad to “pass five hurdles and kill six generals”, and I am certainly no exception.
The “retention” of the unit, the difficulty of taking the “TOEFL”, and the GRE, and applying for funding are not a problem. I waited in front of the U.S. Consulate for four days and four nights when I got a visa in Chengdu. What’s even more mysterious is that I didn’t get the second I-20 form sent to me until the afternoon of the day before my visa! Although I was not a believer at that time, I also felt a pair of loving hands leading me.
When I first arrived in the United States, I faced many difficulties at once due to the Xi of life and the loneliness of being separated from my wife. But as soon as I arrived in Alabama, “Lao Liu”, a fellow villager and fellow of the same lineage, came to pick me up at the airport. The family helped me a lot during that time, and it became a common thing for me to run here and there in a car, I soon learned that they had just become Christians at that time. Through them, I gradually got to know more Chinese and American Christian friends, and these “brothers and sisters” helped me a lot in life and spiritually, and also took me to “Bible study” and church.
I saw in them the flashes of life full of God’s love, full of peace and joy, and made me yearn for the faith behind this real life again. Studying the Bible in the Bible study allowed me to understand the basic essence of the Christian faith directly and authentically. At first, of course, I had endless questions, but because the atmosphere of the Bible study was very free and lively, I was unceremonious, and bold to ask questions and debate with my Christian friends, and the brothers and sisters always answered patiently and humbly discussed. I gradually realized my previous prejudices and misunderstandings about theism and Christianity, and I began to break through some of the barriers that I used to think of as “scientific reason”. The truth of the Bible, the comparison between evolution and creationism, the difference between Christianity and other religions – the repeated thinking and discussion made me more and more rationally agree with the Christian faith. The Bible and the words of the Lord Jesus have often shaken and touched my heart.
One Sunday in October ’92, I attended a service at a local American church. I can’t remember exactly what the American pastor said that day, but my heart was deeply touched by God’s love. When the pastor “called” after the sermon to ask those who are willing to accept the Lord Jesus at that moment to come forward, although I still have struggles in my heart and still have so many questions that I can’t understand, I am so deeply moved, I seem to be involuntary, I move to the front desk, make my decision in public, accept the Lord Jesus into my life, be my personal Savior and Lord of life, and let Him manage my life. After believing in the Lord, my life has undergone a lot of changes unconsciously, just like “blind eyes can see now”, my worldview, outlook on life, and values have been completely renewed. I used to be self-centered, morally self-righteous, and denied the existence of God, but now I know God’s creation and the sinful nature of man, and God has given me a heart of obedience to God and thanksgiving.
In the past, I searched hard for the meaning of life but found nothing, but now I can know the God who created all things in the universe and the breath of life because of the love of Jesus Christ, and through prayer and reading God’s Word and Bible, we can get close to God, experience God’s guidance in life, get God’s care every day, have a “spiritual pillar” when we are working and sorrowful, and have a source of strength when we encounter difficulties. I used to be irritable, selfish, and aggressive, but now by living in Christ and relying on God’s leading, my temper has gradually improved, and I can learn to love others in Xi church. The most obvious example is the relationship between husband and wife with his wife. Now everyone says that we are “loving and considerate”, but in fact, our original personality and temper are not so good, it is entirely because after believing in the Lord, the two of us can pray together from time to time and “obey one another” according to the teachings of the Bible, and the beautiful family life is so preserved by God. I deeply feel that becoming a Christian and being a child of God has given me the ultimate faith and purpose in my life, and it has also given me a positive attitude towards life.
My wandering soul no longer wanders, and my lost soul returns to its eternal homeland. I have been lovingly guided by God in my previous studies, job search, and current job, and I have enjoyed God’s gift of “a richer life” spiritually, this “lifestyle” has brought me a calm and stable state of mind and spiritual satisfaction and happiness beyond the environment. Looking back on the path I have traveled, I am grateful for God’s grace in me. I used to lament that fate is like “God’s dice”, but in fact, there is no “accident” with God at all. Looking back today, every step of my “journey of faith” is the traction of God’s grace and the care of God himself. God’s love makes me marvel at it, look up to it, and wish I could share it with my family and friends. Friend, if you are willing to open the door of your heart, if you truly desire to seek the truth, I believe that God will also seek you so that you too can enjoy this “amazing grace” and have this eternal life. For this is God’s will and God’s promise. “Ask, and it will be given to you, seek and find, and knock, and it will be opened to you.” (Matthew 7:7)